Skyline

Two words.
HUMAN.
VACUUMS.

PoTC: On Strange Tides

The fourth PoTC movie is about how Blackbeard jumps through a rip in time, then goes to double hell after scaring a bunch of sparkly vampire mermaids with a remote-controlled ship with flame throwers. Also, the remote-control is a sword.

Teen Titans Go!

Teen Titans Go! is a show about an orange alien, a grey half-demon, a cyborg, an okay guy with the not-so-unfortunate name of Richard Grayson, and an awesome guy with the unfortunate name of Garfield Logan.

A Brief Summery of the Relationships in Kingdom Hearts

Riku wants to screw Sora, Sora wants to get laid by Kairi, and Kairi has no interest in dating them, but still wants to watch the two fight over her.

Sleeping Beauty

One of the original versions of Sleeping Beauty is this story of a girl who cannot wake up because of a magical splinter, then a prince comes and knocks her up. Then she gives birth to twins, who in their hunger start to suck on her fingers. This dislodges the splinter, she wakes up, and promptly goes 'What the fuck?'

Lady and the Tramp

Lady and the Tramp is a Disney movie about some dogs who love each other. Oh, and one dog meets a crack-whore dog in the pound.

Spider-Man

Spider-Man is the story of a boy who suddenly develops muscles, an interest in girls, and starts shooting white stuff everywhere.